Sunday, October 11, 2009

A day to remember

It is a good day to stop for one minute and remember. Think about the things that made you what you are. All the things that you used to hate when you were a child but that at the end of the day made the difference.


It is hard to realize you are the result of all your needs… no dad, working mom, not belonging to the “normal crowd”. Trying to be you when everybody is so different is not the easiest thing.

When you are in your late 30’s, is easy to feel old and grieve for the good old years. But wait, stop and thing: what good years? The years where you didn’t have your own means to do anything? Or the years when you had to wait for your mom to feel like taking you out when and where she had the time? Or the years when you didn’t fit in because you were so insecure and your self esteem was so low that you rather stay home?

I don’t want that back. I like what I am, I love what I have and I embrace my new age with perks.

Now I can go, do, be self assure and whole and ready for the next step. It feels great to be free and have the guts to decide, to stop pretending and waiting until the age is right, it feels good to be the one responsible of your own acts, nobody to blame.

I am grateful for my suckiness. I am glad for had been the ugly duckling. Thankful for not letting me feel deserving and superior. Now I have the age to recognize what it took to made me what I am. My weaknesses then are now my stronger features. Welcome to my gray hairs, I can color you pretty. Nice little wrinkles, I can disguise you with gracefulness.

You know what the best part is? The feeling of calmness, peace of mind and comfort in my own skin because my past is the foundation of my present which is the only future I’m certain about.

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